The early days of fostering
Could you foster Marcia?
We are looking for foster carers for Marcia. Could you be her new foster carers? Why not find out more?
Usually by the time you are about to receive a young person into your home you will already know a lot about them and you may have seen them and their parents during any pre-placement visits. The prospect of imminently caring for someone's child can make this period quite an anxious time. This worry will also be shared by your own children who will have a variety of feelings about the prospect of another child coming to live with them.
Foster carers should not expect the children in their care to be grateful to them. You should always be very sensitive to the experience of children leaving their own family and coming to live with you. This will be traumatic for the child whatever the circumstances, and the child will feel the very real pain of separation from both family and friends.
Children who come into a foster family have a right to maintain contact with their parents and other members of their family. In many cases children will be returning to their parents and it is therefore important that carers provide a welcoming place for the parents to visit as well as a place for the child to live.
There are a number of very important issues, that you should try to consider prior to the placement starting, and your support worker will be the ideal person to help you here. With experience you will find that issues, fully considered prior to placement can avoid a lot of difficulties for you in the future.
Your House Rules.
Every family has its own distinct set of rules about how each member of the family should conduct themselves within the home. The family the young person comes from will have their own house rules that may be very different to your own. You should ensure that the young person is told clearly what house rules you have and you should be prepared to show a little flexibility whenever this is appropriate.
For example, you may have a house rule that any teenagers are responsible for keeping their own bedroom tidy. However, the young person may come from a home where this has never been expected of them. For you to expect from the first day of their placement that the young person is able to do this is simply not realistic. They are going to need your help and support to make this transition. Perhaps for a short period you should offer to help them tidy their bedroom. From this they will begin to understand what you expect them to do for themselves.
Placement agreements will often cover many of your house rules but you should consider if your family has any rules or expectations that should be made clear from the outset. A little thought about this can save a lot of problems further down the line.
"A Home from Home" - Guardian Article.
